dude tomorrow is going to suck. i do not want to be tired but i am an idiot and didnt do my homework so i have to get up real early to do it. plus i have to work tonight (i am here right now) until god knows when. i have class at 10, but i had to do this algorithms assignment, which is due tomorrow at that class, where i have to give ‘detailed direction from the lecture room to the lab room’. shoot me in the face please. i also had to ‘give detailed directions for tying shoelaces’ punch my eyelashes off please. anyways i didnt do the one that i have to give directions from the lecture room to the lab room so i have to get up and go to that building in the morning, do it and then come back type it up and print it and then go right back to that building to go to the lab there. frick. definately not happening again.

haha i feel like i am wearing a hat right now. but i am not. probably because ive been wearing one for like a week straight after…heh.

woah, anyways.
im really excited to go home this weekend. i will get to see Heidi and Joey in the One Act (hopefully with Laurie) and there is the reception for my cousins wedding on saturday and hopefully friday night i will get to hang out with Sarah. i do not know about sunday but i dont know when i am coming back here. hopefully we can have a poker tournament or something with my family.
shit. i have a lot of homework for my theater class and its memorizing things so i should probably start on that at least one day before its due. i really hope i hold on to that one.

*note to self dont forget to let steph know when and where the one act is at*

its really cold here at work and its bothering me because i just wore a tshirt and my jacket is really warm so if i put that on i will roast but right now my nips hurt…especially the one…owie. anyways that was pointless.

k im done. i wish i could think enough to write something of substance but im real tired and its just not working. sorry.

peace

ive been thinking and i would absolutely LOVE to be a songwriter. one of the reasons i say this is because ive gone to some of Solution 13’s practices where Bob (the lead singer) isnt there and so they just play the music. and i can just make up words in my head of things that i would love for songs to say. I would love to be able to have music played to me and just put lyrics to it. also because it seems like there are a lot of things that i want to say that can only be said poetically like that. or not that they can ONLY be said that way but that is how it would best be captured. too bad i cant sing for shit, but i would love to write it.

that reminds me of when Sarah sang to me. she wrote those songs herself and they are just amazing. there was nothing in the background it was just her voice and it was so kick ass. its absolutely fascinating to think that these words are coming straight from the persons heart. i love that.

its also amazing to me that the friends i worked hardest to be with are some of the most amzing people. i wish no one would feel like they had to be shy or hold themselves back for any reason. everyone is amazing in their own way and people will see that if you are genuine about it.

AND on the other hand, some of the other kick ass friends that i have i just connected with them instantly. i love that some of my friends i am incredibly close with yet havent been friends with them for very long.
i love friends

i hope i dream a lot tonight…..

peace

im in a really weird mood.

once again i am tired but i do not want to go to bed. i have homework but do not want to do it. i kinda want to go to work. i just want to sit and listen to music. what i really would like to do is be with people and hang out and talk, but no one is awake on a sunday night at 1230 that is accessible to me. Angie went to sleep cuz she has to get up at 8. and i still know none of my neighbors.

i just realized that in every picture i have of myself i am smiling so huge that my eyes are squinted closed. haha. and in this picture that is on here we are both Jessica. heh.

anyways i went to visit Nancy and Patrick and the girls today. i really didnt want to get up off of my buns but i knew that if i didnt, that i never would. and i told them i would come and i didnt want to be like yeah im not going to come over anymore cuz i just feel like just sitting here. haha. so i got to play with Samantha. shes so awesome and smart and cute and i love her. shes so amazing for a 3 year old. and it was real fun cuz we danced made music. she used one of those tins that you get for christmas with a christmas design on it and cookies or nuts or something comes in them and she just banged on it. and i had this little easter egg thing with beads in it so it was a shaker and we just danced all crazy it was awesome. but Rachel and Nancy didnt feel well so i felt really bad because i hate when people dont feel well. and haha Patrick was downstiars playing vidyas. im real excited for when they movie on march 1st. i get to help them move in and stuff it should be a blast.

Ang and I had so much fun tonight doing absolutely nothing. all of a sudden i broke out in a song that played on a commercial and it was the dumbest song but after i started singing it i couldnt stop. and then she told me to stop but i just made noises at her. we laughed so much it was awesome. she let me copy all of her music onto my computer, which might not have been the best idea cuz it might slow it down, but i just love music and i cant help it. so that was really nice of her.

well that was my day.

peace

well, we didnt go to madison. the weather was real bad, Heidis dad ended up getting in a major accident his truck is totaled, but none of it was his fault so he gets a new car. anyways Harry really didnt want us to go last night when he called because if he got in an accident imagine how easy it would be for us to. plus the storm wasnt supposed to be past wisconsin until this afternoon or so and he just didnt like the idea of it. its cool though, we had a kick ass time last night. Angie taught us how to play Lottery…so if you want to get real fucked up, let me know ill teach you Lottery.

Heidi Erich Joey Ruby and I all met Dave at the frat house to go to lunch. he called us last night to see what was up and when he found out that they were in the cities he wanted to see them too. we went the the pasta bar or whatever in dinkytown. it was real nice the bathrooms were KICKASS…AND we got 1/2 off for being students. actually all 6 of us ended up getting 1/2 off. i think they did that because ruby was like choking and we had to find someone to get us some more water and it took awhile, but we didnt ask for it or anything, she just gave it to us, so that was nice.

anyways right after that Heidi Erich and Joey went home. i really didnt want them to leave so soon cuz i miss them so much (even though i saw them on sunday and will see them again on thursday…but still) i love them, and i can never get enough of them. but heidi really wanted to be able to talk to her dad. his phone died and so she was just worried about him since he had to stay in a hotel by himself (well, with buster) and his phone was dying.

so but after they left Rubz hung out with me. Angie had to get up this morning at like 6 and go to work, poor Angie. but yeah Rubz and i just caught up it was really nice to see her again, i missed her too over break. i didnt realize how long it actually was. and then Rubz and I went to get my film that i had developed and some of the pictures are sooo awesome. i think i posted them here. after we were done talking and everything Angie got home from work and then Rubz wanted to go back to her dorm to work on some homework. so angie and i tried to find someplace to put air in her tire. turns out 6 out of the nearest 7 gas stations have air that is out of order. assholes. and then when we found one that actually worked, it COST us 50 cents. then we came back and just hung out until it was time to go to mystic lake.

haha Last time Angie and Rubz and Maggie went to Mystic Lake to play bingo and they just loved it. plus its real cheap so its nice. and so we went and played bingo tonight. we were too tired to do anything else. no one won anything though :( and i played blackjack for awhile and lost $30….that is hard on me. oh well. and then we came back to our apartment and watched Mean Girls. heh what a good movie.

yeah so im real tired but its the kind of tired where as long as im thinking about something, im wide awake, but once i stop, just for a second, i cant keep my eyes open. i dont like sleeping anymore, i feel like there are so many things i could be doing instead of sleeping. its stupid. but i lose…..i guess i should go to sleep.

peace

im just waiting waiting waiting for Heidi and Erich and Joey to get here………

okay, so i might die. i went to make myself a latte today because i wanted one real bad..a hot one even. i never want hot ones i always like the iced ones with honey. well so i go to make it as soon as i get back from class…and THE STEAMER DOESNT WORK. i almost cried. so i dont know if it like stopped working cuz maybe something broke or something when i brought it back in the car from home or what, but im really sad. *sigh* oh well.

hahahahaha so dont ask me why but i still have Amanda brix added to my msn messenger and her screen name today is “getting engaged…FINALLY” or something like that and it just makes me laugh….haha i feel bad for whoever is getting enganged to her. i hope its not Eric, but then again i would be willing to bet that it is. so sad. hahahahahahaha

just a minute ago, Joeys screen name popped up on MSN and i thought that meant that he couldnt come with Heidi and Erich because maybe his mom didnt want him to be driving with them in this weather (its snowing like crazy. there is already about 6 inches and the snow is not supposed to stop until like 6 am tomorrow morning!) but hopefully it was just his mom or dad accidently signing on his name because he signed off right away. it just made me nervous.

haha i love quoting anchorman its such a fucking hilarious movie i just want to watch it again RIGHT NOW.. even though ive seen it about 15 times already. one time at work i even watched it twice in one night. what a great movie. i love brick. i love lamp….i, i love lamp.

i just love that picture of melanalalaly….its SOOO cute!!! i have it up on my desktop even. ha.

so i really want to go to california in march for spring break to visit Anna Potter cuz she goes to school there…but i just dont know. i mean i really really want to, but after what my dad said to me the other day i would…feel bad i guess. he just mentioned the idea that he wants me to talk to him before making any big financial decisions because he wants to be able to help out as much as he can with everything. i dont even know if you can consider that a big financial decision…but yes you can. i just feel like you only live once. and i actually have money for once and ive always wanted to go somewhere warm in the winter and she wants me to soo bad. and i miss her and want to see her and it would be so wonderful if i could…its sad because the only thing holding me back is the fact that i dont want to tell my parents cuz they will think im wasting my money. i KNOW it wont be a waste, but i just care so much about what my parents have to say. i mean its not like i have to ASK them if i can go or anything, especially because that is one of the things that dad said. he was like we know that even if we dont like the idea of you doing something big, we wont try to stop you either. its really weird how he would bring that up so randomly when i was thinking abotu doing this. i wonder if he found out somehow that i was thinknig about it. gosh my dad is amazing…he knows EVERYTHING. and i hate keeping this from them, but then again its not like ive bought the tickets or anything. i havent even decided for sure if i am going. we will see. i kinda want to wait until the last minute to buy tickets because it seems like they will be cheapest then. but then again if i do wait and then end up being really expensive it will be too late and iw ill be screwed. dammit i dont know waht to do.

anyways

peace

doot dee doo. well i am at work again and im real bored and avoiding doing some reading. which is constructive, but no please.

so yesterday im getting the mail and everything and i see that there is a little slip in there that says there is a package in the office. so i go in there, and the lady is like okay well look behind you there is a package there….WELL this package that is there is for apt 220. i live in 317. frick. so im like, uh, this is for apt 220. and shes like. oh. hmm. well i know that there was one, no there was two there for 317 but i think your roommate picked one of them up. im like okay, well where is the other one. and shes like well maybe 220 came in here and accidently picked up yours instead of theirs. so im like okay great. so i went and knocked on 220’s door but no one answered. so im like well i guess ill try to shove a note under the door or something. so i write a little note asking if they picked up the wrong package. well later last night this guy came to my door with my note, and he knows nothing about it. so im like GREAT. i go back into the office today and the lady just doesnt know what to do. and i dont blame her at all because i know in the beginning when we first moved in that the office doesnt sign for packages. well she was nice and actually did this time…because there was like 10 packages at once and i guess the delivery man begged her to. and she even asked for ID’s when they came to pick up their packages. but she also said that she didnt watch which package they grabbed. so im hoping that if someone did take my package on accident they either havent realized it yet or they just havent had time to bring it back to the office or something. either that or my package hadnt really arrived and that slip in our mailbox was for Angies package that she got the same day. we will see. frick.

haha i made Angie change her voicemail to the part in Anchorman where Ron answers the phone but Veronica doesnt say anything…”hello hello whos there im talking. who is this? Baxter? Baxter is that you? bark twice if youre in Milwaukee. is this Wilt Chaimberlain?…” hahahahahah fricken love that movie. BRICK IS MY HERO…uhh, i think i ate your chocolate squirrel. heh. I DONT KNOW WHAT WERE YELLING ABOUT!……LOOOUUUD NOOIISES! fricken love Brick.

so Angie got us SNOCORE TOUR tickets!!!(Chevelle, Crossfade, Helmet, Future Leaders of the World..) im so excited! its on the 10th. damn yeah it will be a good time. if anyone wants to go its at the quest and there are still tickets availible. that would be awesome.

gosh i wish i didnt feel like i want to go to sleep all the time. then i feel so lame. but i will be able to sleep in tomorrow i only have to be at class at 1220. holy shit i want it to be tomorrow SO BAD. i cant wait for Heidi and Erich and Joey to get here. its only been like 4 days but i miss them so much! especially Heidi.

haha speaking of Erich. i had a really weird dream today while i was taking a lil nap. so okay i was over at Erichs one day and Heidi was there. and all of a sudden Luc runs in and hes like ‘you guys i just found a decapitated head’ and were all like ‘yeah right Luc. im sure you did’ and he was like ‘no im serious’ and we just ignored him. well so i leave or whatever and come back the next night, when it was dark out, and im searching for something in the back seat of my car. and its dark right. well for some reason there is a cooler back there (in my dream it was no big deal as if i knew it was there) and i opened that cooler and was feeling around inside for something when all of a sudden i felt this big round thing wrapped in a plastic bag. it felt like it so i thought it was the decapitated head. i immediately ran into the house and was freaking out. i kept asking Erich to come outside with me but i never told him why i just kept asking him to come out there with me (cuz i obviously wanted to show him but i didnt want to tell him what it was about cuz he wouldnt believe me) but he just wouldnt come out. so then im like Luc will YOU come outside with me please please please. and i just kept begging both of them. but neither of them would. and then finally Erich turns to Luc and says ‘it actually worked?’ and then i flicked both of them off. and sat down. then one of them went outside and brought it back in and it was a PUMPKIN wrapped in a plastic bag and put it on the endtable in the living room. then i woke up. WEIRD.

i talked to heidi tonight and she had her surgery for her ear today. i really hope she feels better i hate the thought of her being sick.

holy shit. okay. tonight i found out that two of my favorite shows are now on at the SAME time. FRICK. after my nap i made sure to wake up in time for The O.C. and when I went into the living room to watch it i saw Angie watcing Life As We Know It. WTF!? that used to be on at 8 not 7!!! and i know how much Angie loves that show and its practically the only show she watches so i let her watch it and we just flipped back to The O.C. during commercials. *sadface* i didnt get to see much of The O.C…. but Heidi said she will copy Season One for me so i will be able to watch that at least. …and i can get Angie into it too :).

haha so yesterday i met one of my ‘neighbors’ for the first time. 2 months in our apartment and we know NONE of our neighbors. i met him when i was putting that note on the 220s door about the package. he lives right next to 220 (must be 218) and he talked to me. i dont remember his name though. for some reason i think its micheal…but i just dont remember. im such a jerk. i would like to go talk to him again just cuz he seemed really nice, but i dont want to if i dont remember his name. but then again what are the chances that he remembers mine. we will see

well i think thats all i have for now.

PEACE

so as you know this is … dun dun dun … my first time. i just wanted to have start. well i am currently at work and am real bored. where i work all i have to do is load paper and stack books for this huge ass 40 ft long laser printer and so i have a lot of nothing time to do nothing.
i really want to get a good picture up so that it doesnt sit there in grey saying ‘no photo’. but i dont have any pictures of me from after i cut all of my hair off in june and so none of them really look like me anymore. i have some good pictures on a camera from new years and stuff and i will put up a picture when i get those developed.
so im really nervous about stacking up student loans. anna just was talking to me today about having problems with financial aid and i am getting nervous too. so far this year i will have $11000 worth of loans and that is a LOT. plus it will just compound next year. but i was once told by a very wise uncle of mine that there are two times in your life when you can stack up huge amounts of debt. college is one, and buying a house is another. its a little reassuring, but i just hate the idea of having debt.
so im really really really excited for Solution 13’s first show (well, second, because my grad party was the first lol) but i honestly CANT wait. it will be intense. i dont know why but i just love their music so much. everything about it is so novel to me and its just kick ass. they even let me make their band logo so GO TO http://www.myspace.com/solution13 and check it out. i know they dont have much up there yet but thats just because they only signed up for here a couple of days ago and they dont have much time to get to it. i will get some pictures of them playing at a practice, but i will need to get some more of neil. dont worry.
anyways im out, i gotta try to not fall asleep driving home from work.
peace