i dont know. im just feeling really grateful. but at the same time, so overwhelmed. like, i havent had the chance to read anything for school yet, and im getting really worried about that. if work doesnt change sometime soon, im going to have to leave earlier than 10 to get something done for school. im hoping that the art school books wont be so hot all the time, so that i can spread them out and do them during the week instead of others running them also. and school wont be too much, i thought it would be with french, but i think that is going really well and (hopefully) wont be a lot of outside of class work. anyways, i dont know, i think i just get in these moods soemtimes with the gratefulness. like, im so grateful for mom and dad, holy shit if i had to pay every time for an oil change, or even just the advice that dad gives me about things (especially related to mechanics) i dont know how much that would be. or mom getting me plants for me to grow on my own, or paying the car insurance. and with work, all of the opportunities i have. and with school too, learning so much (though costly). and with my friends. i feel so bad that ive been putting off talking to heidi. but i just really want to wait untl i have a lot of quality time to spend to talk with her. instead of being interrupted or anything. but i feel bad because i dont want her to think im ignoring her or that i just dont want to talk to her right now or antyhing like that. its nothing like that. and especially with kany. i dont know what it is, but i just can never get enough of him.. like, i never want to be away from him. i dont know…hes just so easy to talk to and comfortable to be around, hes such a great partner to share everything with. haha i dont know, im just grateful., and overwhelmed